Two weeks ago, the State Attorneys were riding high, sporting an undefeated record as well as a solid chance at winning the division. The team’s eyes were set on the Law League title. Now, after a first-round playoff loss, the only thing that remains is an autopsy report on the untimely death of its season.
The State Attorneys ended the regular season with a punishing 21-0 loss to Akerman Senterfitt, who picked up the Senior Division Title and sewed up the best regular season record in the league. Even still, the playoff draw looked good with a first-round game against the Medical Scrubs and Art Hernandez. The Scrubs were able to create the element of surprise with the X-factor, also known as sending the athletically challenged Hernandez on a trip to Tallahassee on game night. The Scrubs pulled out a 28-14 victory, moving on to play Akerman Senterfitt in the semifinals.
In the Junior Division, it appeared as though perennial champs Better Tritt were moribund early in the season with two losses. The Tritt squad fought through the tough start and were able to secure the division title with a victory against Florida Coastal School of Law. That set up a semifinal game against Pajcic & Pajcic and its geriatric quarterback, Gary Pajcic, who pulled off a playoff upset over the young and talented Florida Coastal squad, 26-19, using the West Coast offense.
There was a restoration to normalcy in the semifinals. After a rough start in the first half, Akerman Senterfitt remained undefeated with a 21-13 victory to dispatch the upstart Medical Scrubs. No doubt, however, that we have not heard the last of Scrubs coach Art Hernandez. The odds are that he will petition the league to extend the game another 20 minutes. In the other semifinal, Better Tritt maintained its drive to a back-to-back championship with a 19-13 victory against the game Pajcic squad. Tritt quarterback Joe Camerlengo rushed for a touchdown and Chris Puleo scored another to reach the Law Bowl.
Then it happened again, Akerman rolled into the Law Bowl with a spotless record only to have all of the gains of the season taken away when Better Tritt rolled to a 41-22 victory to win the championship. Akerman was plagued by five interceptions, mostly on tipped passes, to set up good field position and close out the game early. It was Better Tritt’s second consecutive title.
But the law league is less about which teams wins and more about individual accomplishments. So without further ado, here comes the All-Law League team.
Quarterback: The Medical Scrubs had the best quarterback, but since the team was a bunch of doctors, he has about as much chance of getting all-star honors as I do in taking a doctor’s deposition without paying a $600 per-hour fee. Start accepting the statutory witness fee and I’ll start thinking about giving you guys some postseason honors. Gary Pajcic led his team to many victories, but also threw more interceptions than Chris Rix against North Carolina. Joe Camerlengo is like Eric Crouch; it’s the system, not the player.
The starting nod goes to Greg Prince of Akerman Senterfitt. But know this, Greg. Non-Lawyers get the award once and never again. Savor the flavor because you’ll never see it again. Next year’s All-Star spot is already taken. All-Star honors will go to FCSL’s Gordon Fenderson. Rumor has it he is set to graduate, and there will be a bigger fight for his services than a duel between George Fallis, Wimpy and me for the last free cheeseburger at a picnic. Honorable mention goes to State Attorney’s Brian Wright, a master of the timing route who lost points because of his part-time role this season.
Receiver: There is lots-o-love to go around this year. But the honors go to Jeff “Law Dog” Moody at the State Attorneys and Ian Pajcic of . . . I forget what team he plays for. Anyway, both gave their quarterbacks the ability to throw it up in the air with the assurance that they would go after it harder than a nursing home negligence client. The alternate selection is Akerman’s David Repass who uses his 6-foot-5 frame to his advantage. There were others. Surly Kurt Pajcic of . . . I keep forgetting the name of that team, and David Dearing of Better Tritt, who lost out on first-team honors because he only “plays when he wants to play”.
Pass Rusher: Ray Reid of Pajcic & Pajcic wins this one. His motor runs almost as fast as his mouth in trying to get calls from the referee. If Reid did any more politicking, he would have to be registered by the state as a professional lobbyist. Regardless, he made quarterbacks make quick decisions with the ball, and that’s all you can ask of a pass rusher. I know I am going to get a call from Alan Wachs, but he lost a step spending his days and nights billing ungodly hours for Holland & Knight. Wachs also lost the benefit of having rushing assistance from former teammate Judge Emmet Ferguson, who moved on to referee duties this year. The backup, in case a scandal prevents Reid from performing his duties, is Jay Brown of Akerman Senterfitt. A good pass rusher and a solid guy. Plus, the Harry Connick Jr. look earned him a large block of the female vote.
Defensive Back: The winners are Ricky “living la vita loca” Britton of Better Tritt and Chris Karpinski of Pajcic & Pajcic. Britton may have been the only person that had the speed and stamina to stay with FCSL’s Fenderson. We also learned something else about the shaved-headed Britton. During an interception return, an opponent missed grabbing the flag but did manage to get a handful of his shorts. All I can say about this event, during which my eyes started bleeding, is this: I have seen less hair in a Dennis Franz rear-shot nude scene on NYPD Blue. Karpinski was able to play well even with his glasses fogging up due to his superhuman efforts. Someone needs to put him touch with VisionWorks for a contact lens fitting. One of the Moran brothers of the State Attorneys could have won the award, but I keep getting them confused. Consequently, either one of them is a true all-star or my confusion makes me attribute the play of two players to just one of them.
Other players deserve special mention: The class act award is shared between Pete Larson of Akerman Senterfitt, Chad Dean of Florida Coastal (some firm needs to give this guy a job) and John Guy of the State Attorneys. All three handled themselves as gentlemen and competitors on the field. Plus, it didn’t hurt that John Guy let Jimmy Smith off easy.
The Babe Zaharias Award goes to Cheryl Miede for her defensive efforts on behalf of Better Tritt. Good football player, great looks, easy going, likes sports, and, get this, she shoots in the 90s from the men’s tees. Obviously, People Magazine needs to add someone to its annual Top 50 list. Miede is so much the total package that I could not resist and popped the question: Will you play golf on my team for the Jacksonville Bar Annual Meeting Tournament. I am proud to announce that she said yes. I know Dan Bean wanted her for his golf team but the restraining order prevented him from asking about her availability. Given that Miede was the only female player this year, it appears she will continue to get this award annually. This is a call out to female members of the bar to get involved in law league sports to prevent up-and-comer Technology Law guru Miede from winning the award every year.
A special thanks to Judge Ferguson, who donated his time to referee games to raise money for the Jacksonville Bar YLS.