by Richard Prior
Staff Writer
The highlights include visits to the zoo, trips to the beach, football and baseball games, movies . . . and the time that life-size plastic fly wound up on Shaelyn Haag’s plate.
“When she saw the fly she hollered and screamed, ‘Oh no!’ ” Tomeshia Brock wrote. “First she thought it was real, and then she realized it was fake.
“We laughed till our sides hurt! We always laugh and share a smile wherever we go. I know we are fun and funny together!”
They’re also happiest when they’re giving to others, which is a big reason why Shaelyn Haag recently was named Florida’s Big Sister of the Year.
A chartered bus took local Bigs and Littles to Tallahassee, where Haag was presented her award by Lt. Gov. Toni Jennings. She is now contending for the national Big Sister award, which will be presented in June.
“I was told after the fact that a big reason for this was our community service,” said Haag. “Tomeshia worked really hard to make this happen. But it’s not what I do. It’s what we’re doing together.”
When the City offered time for its staff to be mentors, Haag went to the training with her mother, Shirley Haag, who is judicial assistant to Judge James A. Ruth. The Kesler Mentoring Connection taught volunteers the basics of mentoring, “the things you want to do and the things you want to stay away from,” said Haag.
She had written down Big Brothers Big Sisters as the agency she was most interested in and wanted to be placed “wherever the greatest need is,” Haag recalled.
“At that time, it was the Bigs in School program,” she said. “That’s basically a commitment of one hour a week. You come here on the school grounds, meet with the child for an hour.
“That’s how Tomeshia and I started, when she was in the second grade.”
In the beginning, Haag and Tomeshia spent a lot of time working on reading skills, which had been something of a challenge.
“She went from reading a word at a time to a sentence at a time,” said Haag. “Then a page. Now she’s all the way up to chapter books.
“I’m definitely proud of Tomeshia. The progress she’s made from second grade to the fifth grade. Now she’s on the A/B honor roll. That’s a huge accomplishment.”
In an unexpected twist, Tomeshia now has taken on the additional responsibility of making sure “her Shae” also keeps up her grades. Haag, who had been in medical sales, is now in her first semester at Florida Coastal School of Law.
“It’s pretty neat, isn’t it?” Haag said to Tomeshia, outside Spring Park Elementary School. “I always asked you about your homework and tell you that you have to do well in class.
“Now I have to listen to my own advice.”
Tomeshia herself wants to continue doing well and perhaps become a nurse.
As the relationship grew over the past few years, so did the time they spent together.
“After the second grade, Tomeshia decided she was enjoying the program, so she wanted to switch over to community-based,” said Haag. “The difference is we’re no longer restricted to just meeting on the campus.
“They usually ask for a commitment of five hours a week. This allows us to go out in the community and do volunteer work. And we go to the theater and sporting events. If it’s to be done in Jacksonville, we’ve done it.”
The two have fed the homeless at the Clara White Mission, brought “thinking of you” cards to nursing home residents, volunteered at Hospice, cleaned up the beach and picked up trash at Tomeshia’s school.
“I’m a big believer in giving back to the community,” Haag said. “I feel that, if I can instill those qualities in Tomeshia, my gift of giving through mentoring will live on through her being able to give back.”
Big Brothers Big Sisters allows the two officially to stay together until Tomeshia is 16. Then they “graduate” from the program.
“At that point, after just about 10 years, we’ll know each other so well we won’t need any kind of official programming,” said Haag, who appreciates that Tomeshia is “a very giving person.”
“I think she’s happiest when she can give to others,” said Haag. “That’s why we do so much volunteer work. It’s something she enjoys. She gets a real sense of accomplishment out of it.”