Pat McGarry often thinks about what his youngest sister would be like today.
Would she have had children?
How old would they have been?
What would she be doing with her life today?
Katie McGarry-Noack would have been 45.
She was a newlywed when she attended a technology conference at the Windows on the World restaurant at the top of the North Tower at the World Trade Center.
She was one of almost 3,000 people who died in the terrorist attack that shook the country’s foundation 15 years ago Sunday.
“It doesn’t feel like it’s been 15 years,” McGarry said Thursday.
So much has happened since that day.
McGarry met Mariana at his sister’s New York memorial service. Their relationship turned from long distance to long-term when they married. They have two sons, Shane, 10, and Jonathan, 9.
The boys had only heard stories about Aunt Katie and 9/11 until the family visited New York during the Thanksgiving holiday last year.
It was odd for McGarry. He grew up in New York. He’s always been an avid New York sports fan. He worked at the World Trade Center in 1993 when a terrorist detonated a truck bomb in the basement.
So to be back as a tourist seeing sites like the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island? A little weird for him, he said.
One of those visits was to the National September 11 Memorial and Museum, a “pretty powerful experience” for his boys who had only heard but never seen.
The experience helped them better comprehend the impact, he said. They saw their aunt’s name on the wall and Jonathan wrote her a digital message on the “Notes of Hope” display. He wished he had the chance to meet her, it said.
After that, the family sat down for about a half-hour outside to just talk. The boys had questions, one being the singular word many children have: Why?
He answered it was because the world had good people and bad people. This was a dark, hate-filled moment by the bad people, he told them.
One of the lessons McGarry has taught his sons is respect and admiration for military, police officers and firefighters, many who died trying to save people like Aunt Katie then and work to protect everyone now.
“They did their best that day,” he tells them. “They are there to protect us.”
McGarry still strongly feels that way.
Now in graduate school at the University of Florida, the now 52-year-old managing director at The Energy Authority noticed when eight students raised their hands when asked if they had or were serving in the military.
He simply told them thank you for their service. It’s a long semester and he didn’t want to bombard them with stories.
McGarry thinks of his sister at times every day.
It’s triggered when he sees terrorist attacks being reported on TV, a too frequent reminder of hurt.
The feeling comes back when he sees the firefighter painting in his living room. Or when he sees the “Kate 911” license plate on his SUV.
He said this Sunday, like every calendar day the event falls on, will offer a chance to more strongly reflect on what happened 15 years ago.
He and his family will attend church Saturday evening, then eat breakfast the next day while watching some TV.
There will be a few tears shed. There will be a New York Jets football game to watch. There will be that reflection.
McGarry draws from the ever-quotable Jim Valvano, the legendary North Carolina State basketball coach who lost his fight with cancer in 1993, about days like Sunday.
“If you laugh … and cry, that’s a full day,” said McGarry.
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